I effing hate people sometimes

the new lady at work well i just hate her sometimes
why do people say rude things?
we were talking about my leaving htis job and updating my resume and she offered to help which was nice.
then i mentioned iw as only out of work 5 days between my last jobs, i was proud of myself. and she smarted off with, 'yeah but you had a friend that worked here". so fucking what. that dosn't mean i am any less hireable, qualified or valuable does it? of course not. i effing hate people sometimes.

can you imagine a 289 foot commute???

god takes my car, he takes my kids, he takes my money, he makes me do things i would never have considered doing, and i get to interview for a job next week and the commute is 289 feet.

289 feet. that is what it said on mapqwest.

Tight skirt, bus stop

I love a great joke! And this is nothing like a great joke! Current mood: contemplative Category: Jobs, Work, Careers
I ride the bus and train to get to and from work now. My total commute is a minimum of 5 hours every day. About 2 1/2 hrs ea way.
If I didn't have jokes like this, I jump off the Markham Bridge next time the bus I was on drove over it!

Tight Skirt, Bus Stop

One day, at a bus stop there was a girl who was wearing a skintight miniskirt. When the bus arrived and it was her turn to get on, she realized that her skirt was so tight she couldn't get her foot high enough to reach to step.
Thinking it would give her enough slack to raise her leg, she reached back and unzipped her skirt a little. She still could not reach the step. Embarrassed, she reached back once again to unzip it a little more. Still, she couldn't reach the step.
So, with her skirt zipper halfway down, she reached back and unzipped her skirt all the way. Thinking that she could get on the step now, she lifted up her leg only to realize that she still couldn't reach the step.
So, seeing how embarrassed the girl was, the man standing behind her put his hands around her waist and lifted her up on to the first step of the bus. The girl turned around furiously and said, "How dare you touch my body that way, I don't even know you!"
Shocked, the man says, "Well, ma'am, after you reached around and unzipped my fly three times, I kinda figured that we were friends."

actually this whole thing is just stupid. i think i will stop now.

more links

http://www.rockymountainnews.com/drmn/local/article/0,1299,DRMN_15_4647800,00.html

http://ezine.kungfumagazine.com/ezine/article.php?article=499

http://www.speroforum.com/site/print.asp?idarticle=2483

http://www.coasttocoastam.com/guests/545.html

http://www.gnn.tv/users/user.php?id=62

http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/tg/detail/-/0882822314?v=glance

so today i am trying to find anything i can on this man

i am going to get the book first of all.

then i am going to try to find out where my garbarge is dumped because i would go to the dump and dig it out all those letters i threw away with my bear hands if i could.

i have looked casually for him over the years since our last contact which was approx 1993. i have put his name on my blogs, yahoo id stuff, etc. but nothing ever came back until yesterday. July 19, 2007. his name is on this blog, on like the very first page when i wrote my 103 things about me. It is #7. That is nearly at the top of the list. I wrote that particular list in the spring of 2005.

I wonder if he wrote any other books and how i would find them.

can i cuss on here?

goddamnit to fucking hell i have never been so mad. (at myself)

Just three short weeks ago i threw away an entire box that was full of love letters, cards, pictures, poems, gifts and memorbilia from my very first love. I threw away the script from the play we were in together - that is how we first met. he was the only man, in my whole freaking miserable life, that ever made me feel loved. now it turns out that my very first love led a crazy fantastic life and is famous! and i probably could have sold all of that stuff and made some money. and money is what i need, baby. Cash flow, that is all I care about.

here is the link that explains it a little of it, i just don't have the energy right now. http://www.amazon.com/Race-Against-Evil-Criminals-Real-life/dp/0882822314/ref=sr_1_1/104-8909895-3902343?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1184952094&sr=8-1
that is the link to his book on amazon.com
there is a lot more and i will put the links i have found so far on here.

I have looked for him - on and off - for years. We never forget our first love, right? And wonder where they are, what they are doing. And it was an epic love. The first, the deepest, the longest lasting. Through different states, different colleges, different religions, different parts of the worlds, marriages and children-and death. I wouldn't be with him now of course, but a part of us always wonders...where are they now? what are they doing? are they ok? Love is love, thru time, space, distance, dreams. I saw you again, I walked where we first walked...I have memorized nearly all the hundreds of poems he wrote me. (if he wrote them at all, it makes a person question stuff) The good news is that it doesnt really matter now, but it sure is interesting!!

he is actually a fake and an utter liar, according to what I just now found out, and he has been arrested and may still be in prison, i don't know. but it is all very fascinating and i was his love as all this was going on.
since 1980.
for 27 years i have beebn moving this box of love letters, poems, etc everywhere I go. Just like I move all my babies first pictures, report cards, etc.

AND THEN A FEW WEEKS AGO AS I WAS PACKING TO MOVE, I DECIDED IT WAS FINALLY TIME TO GET RID OF EVERYTHING HE HAD GIVEN ME. (Except for one book of poetry he gave me and a small box of letters, poems, etc. ) They were serving no purpose, hadn't served a purpose for decades, and i was really tired of packing all these boxes of stuff. I mean I really cleaned out my closets of clothes, got rid of I don't know how many boxes and bags of books, etc.

i just have to get this posted and will add more as i have time. un-effing-believable. My mind is spinning.

note to self: maybe men like Howard do exist...see previous post.

asset or liability?

we are conviced we need cars, when in reality they are just another liability. Current mood: amused
this is so ironic.
i manage to get my car, whose transmission just stopped working, towed to my apartment. then we get a notice that the parking lot at my apartment complex is going to be repaved AND I NEED TO FIND ALTERNATE PARKING!
(my girls and i are going to push it aways down the road , and then push it back a few days later. the good news is that we really don't have to move it that far)
I have saved SO MUCH MONEY ON GAS. I really don't mind NOT HAVING A CAR. Now, my new commute is an entire new subject and going to be a real pain the arse'.
i am going to ride my daughters bike approx one mile to the nearest max train station. get on max and change trains either two or three times, and then ride the bike about 2-3 miles to my current job. It will take about 128 minutes.

WE GOT THE JOB!

We got the job. Well, almost, it is so close I can taste it! Or at least I am one step closer...it just felt good to say it. Actually I have been told I have the job for months now, but it dosn't mean a whole lot yet till they get on the payroll.
The person that i am to replace has finally left!! The position is open. And the bank manager wants me there bad!!!
I was unable to go to the beach like i had been planning for the last I d0n't know how many months and months. But as it turned out I got to have PF Changs (sp?) chinese food and cold, cold beer with my supposed new boss and I got the good news! I can even get a ride from her to Wilsonville 2-3 days a wk (and i sure hope she dosn't let me down cuz she has a horrible attendance record! Calling in sick for sunburns, hangovers, etc) so...now we wait again...got to get the final ok from her district managers...i am so scared. i am so excited.

this is the link to my old job. this is an ad on craigslist that i found.

when I started this two years ago my starting wage was way more money than they are offerin!! then i got a butt load of raises every few months and made more money than ever.

it makes me sad to see this cuz i really miss that job and those people.

well i am still in touch with some of the people and a bunch of us are going to the beach for the weekend this weekend. but it is not the same as seeing them everyday and working side by side with them.

i have a new boss that started here today and i nearly punched her in the mouth and walked out the door. i actually did delete all my emails and clean my desk cuz i may or may not be here in the morning. she made me so mad and i hate confrontation (I am a lover not a fighter) and she got so in my face that i was shaking!!! and i didn't calm down for a long time. i am trying to arrange rides back and forth to work because my car IS STILL BROKE DOWN. i need a transmission. there is no way i can get a transmission! so i asked them if i could leave a little early and this new boss went thru the roof. she would not give me any room to negotiate. no matter what i had to stay till exactly 5:00 today. and i better be here from 8-5 tomorrow. but it was the way she said it that just threw me back. oh bother. I was so upset and really do not know what to expect, except more of the same...

ps
it is nearly 7pm and i am still waiting for a ride home. i sent by old boss (who is training the new boss) an email that said, "If I am asleep under your desk in the morning, please do not wake me up until the coffee is made". i hope she will laugh. she is my friend. I worked with her at my last job. I have been to her church and her home. Our kids play together. but she found a better job and is leaving.

this is my car. this is my car after my teenager drove it, any questions?

well she didn't crash it, but it did break down. this is how i feel. i feel like this picture looks.

Mawgawrita: Oupa!

Mawgawrita: Oupa!

http://www.greekcusina.com/

Men like Howard do not exist

http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=user.viewprofile&friendid=178325652

Have you read this?! Funniest I heard in a long time!

Martin, a loving husband, was in trouble. He forgot his weddinganniversary and his wife was really ticked off at him. She told him,"tomorrow morning, I expect to find a gift in the driveway that goesfrom 0 to 200 in under 6 seconds, AND IT BETTER BE THERE."The next morning, Martin got up really early before work.
When his wife woke up a couple of hours later, she looked out thewindow, and sure enough, there was a small gift-wrapped box sitting inthe middle of the driveway. Confused, the wife put on her robe, ran outto the driveway, and took the box into the house. She opened it, andfound a brand new bathroom scale.
Martin is not yet well enough to receive visitors.

I miss my old apt

Where we are living now is so small!
I miss my old apt so much. it was huge! Like 1,500 sq ft including the deck.

I have always disliked sales people.

I would never-ever-no-matter-what-in-my-whole-life date a sales man.

It has just always been a rule of mine.

(but i think i might be turning into one!)

Check it out, so this granite & marble gig (job I have been at since April) is starting to work out ok. Our boss has left for China and I have a little less supervision (micro management). I have made some sales today!! We do marble, granite, travertine, etc. counters. I actually had a pretty fun day!! People came in and called and there were no other sales people here, the boss is in China and the shop workers do not speak English. So, I had to figure this all out on my own and I rocked!!!

And on Fridays I wear jeans to work and it is so sexy to go out in the warehouse and get all dirty!

When other sales staff/employees are here, they butt into my business (work). So I back off and let them take over. But often times the customer will still stand by me, look at me and talk to me because I think they know that I click well with people! I listen to what they say and ask appropriate questions regarding what they want and need. When I started this job, even though I am a receptionist/administrative assistant, the boss told me if I sell marble/granite I will make the commission money. I liked that idea because that means more money for me! (Sidebar: I got a $1 per hour raise on my second day because he liked me so much!). See, people just pay me because I am nice. I have been screening new applicants for an accounting position here, and the ones I like best are n.i.c.e. they all have similar skills but the nice ones are really much more enjoyable to be around!!

this is me

I need to find a job where I can get paid to be nice.
That is me.
nice.
and nice matters.
I hate it.
I wish I had more skills.
There are no jobs where someone will pay you to be nice.
I have looked.
they don't exist.
Then...
I saw a quote by Maya Angelou. "People will not remember what you said. They will not remember what you did. They will remember how you made them feel."
I started this card business. Home based and in my "free time". It is fun. I like people and I have a lot of nice friends and family. It is important they know I love and appreciate them.
I can be nice to people. Show other people how to be nice to people.
Earn money. Not sure where that will fit into this scenario exactly. But I think the money will follow later.

I also think I would be a good motivational speaker, but I don't have any topics I could cover eloquently.

ahhh...the "other new job" what a nightmare trying to get it has been (since you asked :))

my supposed new manager at the job in Wilsonville a freakin' alcoholic. And the person who's job I was supposed to take/fill hasn't actually left yet.
"business meetings/interviews" are conducted with infinite amounts of alcohol. Of which we have had a few. And, the next day it seems as if the entire conversation is erased from their memory. Or at least the parts I am interested in. They think I am very qualified but the other two bosses that I have interviewed with also, just want to put me in a lower position that also float to different branches (lots of driving=lots of gas money) and pays less. It would get my foot in the door but I just can't take the lower pay.
Can I?
Even if there are benefits. I must have cash flow, baby, cash flow!!!

I moved this weekend into a smaller apt and feel like I am in college.



(Except for all the children running around)